Ask the Oracle

Here's what's on offer: you ask me questions and I get you answers. Offerings are available at this price for the duration of 2024. Contact me to set something up. I currently take Venmo and Zelle.

Solar return reading*: I will look at your solar return and tell you where planets are clustered and how to make the best use of the energy for the year, and you will get a 20 - 30 minute audio file (I talk a lot) addressing where planets are and what things to keep in mind for the year. If you purchase this for a friend, please make sure said friend understands what a solar return is (which is a reading that's valid only between their current birthday and the next one). $50

Major transits reading*: I will look at your chart and where these planetary clusters are occurring relative to it, and advise. If you have major life moves you're considering and you want input or a second opinion from yours truly ("do i have the energy to move into a yurt this year?"), this is the reading you want, but please tell me the questions you're considering. You will get a 20 - 30 minute audio file with lots of insights. $50

Retrograde report*: If you want to know where you're be focused in 2024 or you're afraid enough of Mercury, Venus, or Mars retrogrades that you want guidance and insights, I got you (note that there is no Venus retrograde in 2024). Again, it's an audio file, but tell me what you're worried about and I'll set you straight. This is useful for if you want to triple check when's a good time to make a major purchase or major life moves, or when it's going to be an uphill struggle in all directions. If your rising sign is Gemini, Virgo, Aries, or Scorpio, consider this for 2024. Again, audio file sent to the place of your choosing. $40

What's cool about my baby/my friend's baby?*: I do these. Get me the baby's birth info and I will get you an overview of the energy I am seeing and potentials to watch for and nurture. This is a cool gift for a new mom who is into astrology, but please don't foist this upon someone who isn't expecting it or doesn't want it. Baby readings are going to give the best possible use of energy. I abhor people saying weird shit or predicting some sort of doom for a baby, so that will not happen with these. I used to do these all the time and moms (still) report back to me that it's fun to see the potentials I discuss develop as the child grows. Audio file, usually about 30 minutes. $75.

Spirit guide and/or live chart readings: 1 hour is $150, phone or Zoom. You will walk way from these with your life path validated and some fresh insights and ideas for what's next for you. Spirit guide readings are far-reaching and intended to connect you to your sense of self and provide guidance from beings who are here to help you, and are particularly valuable if you are feeling lost, stuck, or feel like you're in an existential rut. Ask me about past life stuff or mediumship (speaking to dead people) if that's something you want to do. Prepare for these readings with 2 to 3 big ticket life items you want to discuss, or if you're (fucking) lost, warn me beforehand and again, I will set you straight. I tend to do birth chart and spirit guide hybrid readings, so send me your birth info 48 hours before if you've got it, or at the very least, your birth date and location.

Referral discount: If you love my work and want other people to love it, too, I'm offering 10% off your next reading (including the audio file readings, if desired) if you refer someone to me for a live reading. Basically, I can't help people if they don't know I exist.

Testimonial discount: If you'll write me a 150 (ish) word testimonial about what readings with me are like that I can use for promotional purposes or to validate that spirit guide readings (or my live chart readings) are cooler and less intimidating than they sound, you get 10% off your next reading. If I've read for you in the past and you want to write a testimonial to save on your next reading, I'm cool with that.

*For these readings, please provide your birth information: exact time, birth date, birth location, and current location. Tell me where you'd like the file sent. If you do not have an exact birth time (from your birth certificate) let's talk first. I'm nice, I swear. Turnaround time is faster than 72 hours if I have all the info I need, but let me know if you're having some sort of sky emergency.