How to ask good questions

One of the keys to getting what you want out of astrology (and other intuitive pursuits) is learning to ask good questions. This is an issue of trusting the person who is reading for you and that they won't judge you or spread your business (I won't judge you or spread your business--I've done enough dumb shit that I'd really just like to help other people avoid hurting themselves unnecessarily). The best questions I've ever been asked in a reading are in the seriously awkward category and required that the questioner trust me, a stranger, enough to divulge to me what was really bothering them right off the bat. Once I knew what was REALLY bothering them, I could zero in on that part of their chart and give them some actual pointers on what to do next, and by the end of the hour, we’d formulated a decent plan for dealing with the issue going forward.

These are not real questions I've been asked, but are in the same vein:

"I'm about to go bankrupt because my partner and I made terrible financial decisions and I want to know whether this is going to improve anytime soon.""I want to know why my mother-in-law suddenly turned into a shrew.""I'm married but I've fallen in love with my coworker and I want to know if I should leave my wife."

So imagine a conversation that begins with one of THOSE questions.

Now imagine a conversation that starts with one of these:

"I'd like to know about my finances.""I'd like to know about my family.""I'd like to know about my love life.""I'm just curious what my chart says."

I can talk (mostly uninterrupted) for HOURS about your chart. A new chart to play with is like being in a candy store for me. You can let me babble on endlessly, but if you give me a core problem, like some of the meatier questions in the first list, I am a heat-seeking missile that will zero in on the thing causing you grief, give you constructive things you can do to address the problem, and then give you a timeline, since astrology concerns *time.* What typically happens is that someone will want to talk about family stuff, and we’ll do that for 50 minutes, and then in the last 10 I find out that there was a total fallout with their brother over an inheritance, and now I’m scrambling to find all indicators of a brother fight and come to some sort of sensible conclusion with not a lot of time left. Do not save the best question for last!

Having said all this, don't ask questions you don't want the answers to. This applies in life, generally. Fortunately or unfortunately, I am one of those people who is incapable of lying about whether the pants make you look fat or if Neptune’s going to ruin your birthday. If you hire me for answers, you get answers. But honestly, I can think of a number of questions I really wish people had not asked me, because the answers sucked. Good examples of this include having to admit that certain transits last a long time (like years), or having to say that I did not see indicators of the thing they were really hoping would happen.

Sometimes I know someone is dancing around a question that they're not going to like the answer to. They don't ask explicitly, so I don't say explicitly because I do not want to overstep boundaries. It really depends on the type of conversation I’m having. If it’s relevant to what you asked in the first place and I can see it in your chart, I will say it. If not, then not. Though sometimes I edit what I am saying to be concise and save time. If you have Neptune conjunct Mercury and Saturn in the 3rd house and a Pluto-Mercury conjunction in the 3rd house in your solar return, AND brother problems, at some point I will just summarize and say “yeah your chart’s lookin’ like you have some brother problems!”

In conclusion: decide what you want to know, whether you REALLY want to know, and how much detail you want, and you will have a much better reading.

Oh, final tip: sometimes you SHOULD ask “is there anything else you’re seeing in my chart that you think I should know right now?” Because if I think you *want* to talk about your brother or job or whatever and I see an irrelevant-to-that transit in your house of friends/goals, I’m going to talk to you about what you want to talk about. It’s your time, after all.

XO,J