Your holiday sky survival guide

🦃 Thanksgiving. One of our meat-based holidays. Thanksgiving’s sky is the sky of misunderstandings: the sun will be square Saturn and Mercury will be square Neptune. Someone’s going to get the wrong idea. Someone’s going to be pouting into their pie. How do you make sure it’s not you? First: control expectations before the day. It’s not the day to break it to great Aunt Mildred that you hate her china and won’t be using it. Tell her beforehand. Then, tackle any loose ends that you really need to catch up on before dinner. Like, if there’s potential for a work crisis of some sort, or something that’s nagging you that you need to get checked, do it before the day, because this is a Murphy’s Law sky. There will be contacts from exes who decided over turkey that either they miss you or they're mad at you. There will be dropped casseroles. The oven might even malfunction. If your check engine light is on, check it before driving to your dinner because that is what is called tempting fate and we don't want to do that. Basically: keep an eye on variables. Also: don't ask people for unreasonable favors, because it will be a no.

I'm not threatening you with a bad time here, I'm just conveying that you want to stay loose, and when weird stuff happens, take it in stride. It's not permanent badness energy, it's temporary weirdness energy.

🎄 If you’re a Christmas celebrator, here is my advice: get a puzzle with the most number of pieces you can find. Get a table to put the puzzle on. Involve other people in the puzzle. Anything to keep your brain occupied and your hands busy will do, but a puzzle is a group activity that’s possible to do quietly without arguing. Not a fan? Legos. Still not a fan? Decorate pastries intricately. Wrap presents ornately. Why I am saying this: Mercury is retrograde conjunct Mars at Christmas, and once again, Mercury will be square Neptune (you get a break between Thanksgiving and Christmas from this energy, though). I am thinking that if you keep your little fingers busy, your mouth might be less prone to issuing fighting words. (If you're a person who drops truth bombs via text, maybe give your phone to someone else if your thumbs are feeling twitchy.) Also if you have a gaggle of medium-sized children, make them run wind sprints or something so that they can not tell grandma that she's gained weight recently or that the stuffing is disgusting. (Please note: this is astrology advice and not parenting advice, so results may vary.)

If you’re an online Christmas present-orderer, get presents EARLY this year before the Mercury retrograde. We do not tempt Mercury with poor planning. Mercury is not a planet that will ruin your life, but it will snafu the hell out of it. Even if you do order presents early, CHECK THEM to make sure the right thing was sent in the right quantity.

If you are Virgo or Gemini rising, note I said Mercury is retrograde conjunct Mars for the holiday, so get yourself a "fun" project for any downtime: reorganize your closet, re-file your paperwork, redo your photo album, review your various collections of things*. You're going to want a project because you might be a weird combo of motivated an unmotivated at this time.

Happily, Venus and Neptune are in a nice aspect to each other, and the sun is also in a nice aspect to Jupiter, so there’s the potential for generous acts and warm, fuzzy feelings. (You could use your aforementioned little fingers to do volunteer work, if that appeals.) The potential exists if you can sidestep the Mercury-Mars part, which is mental work. Work first, warm fuzzies second.

🍾 New Years has the same fighty sky, but without the warm fuzzies, so maybe keep working on that puzzle with a million pieces, but what I like about this New Years is it is a great one to make several categories of resolutions: it is decent for diets, it is pretty good for saving money or investing money differently (but check your plan in late January before taking action), it is good for deciding to be a better person/treating people better (especially if you got in a fight with them over the holidays!).

Basically, these holidays call for a backup plan. Be ready to order a pizza or go to a movie (or just take a good long walk to decompress) if things aren't going the way you hoped.

*These might not sound fun for you, but they usually are fun for the Virgos, at least.